tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27601770570751940532024-03-05T01:12:20.308-06:00Water-WingsReflections for parents: thoughts on baptism, faith, family and grace.Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.comBlogger202125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-75557048094063413372020-02-05T11:27:00.000-06:002020-02-05T11:27:05.650-06:00Ice Melt<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've been hibernating for a long stretch now but it seems the time for picking up the digital pen again has arrived. So here we go. . . some more thoughts on water and faith in all it's forms.<br />
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This Minnesota winter has been mild, but the above average temps have created a new winter challenge: ice. Lots and lots of it. During the daytime it warms up just a bit above freezing and melts, then freezes again when the sun goes down. Entire parking lots are like ice rinks. Sloping driveways are hazardous to hips.<br />
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Yesterday, as I shook some salt out on my driveway, I thought about how sometimes people get frozen in the waters of their faith too. They claim that they embrace the gospel of Jesus, but they are harsh and cold and inflexible: hardened, like ice. Maybe the temperature of their lives is too comfortable? Perhaps they forget that while they live in climate-controlled homes, they are not in charge of the weather? From their comfortable perches they can see the clearest path and can begin to judge others who choose apparently incorrect routes because their circumstances are different. My attitude towards these folks is an icy patch on my own faith journey.</div>
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Once someone reaches this frozen state, it often seems the only thing that can change them is being broken - shattered by some disruption to their comfortable life. Many an unexpected loss or challenge has shattered a hardened heart and from a shattered heart, new tenderness and tolerance can be born. </div>
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In these "polar-iced" days, it is tempting to sit back and wait for the worst to happen to those I think have frozen hearts. But Jesus calls me to be salt and light - the very things that can melt what is frozen. So I guess I should share my salty tears and warm hugs with all, those whom I love, and those who may need an icy heart melted. And perhaps that will melt my own icy patches too. </div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-87386917504119250952017-10-09T14:04:00.000-05:002017-10-09T14:04:52.538-05:00Drenched. . .<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This past weekend I went to camp with the great group of kids in this picture. We had to take the picture indoors because it was pouring down rain outside as we prepared for departure. Then, we traveled by van to a nearby town where, in the still-pouring rain, we moved ourselves and our stuff to their bus so we could travel together.<br />
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After driving for a bit over an hour, we arrived at camp where it was still raining. We checked in, carried our stuff through the pouring rain to our cabins, considered if we were dry enough to go on without changing, and headed back to the gathering spot for opening worship and fun and games.<br />
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It was FUN! And as the rain continued to fall through the evening, the night and the morning, we continued to have fun. By early afternoon we had stopped noticing that it was raining and that we were wet. The rain ceased to be a factor in the experience.<br />
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I've been musing about why the kids were so mellow about the rain. I'm sure the counselors were sick of the rain, but they never mentioned it except to point out that a place might be slick, or that a camper should put on a jacket. Our counselors just kept on showing love and joy and patience and kindness and peace and goodness to the campers. The rain simply wasn't a factor.<br />
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What if, when the young people of our church came through our doors, they were so immersed in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness and goodness that the stress and the pain of ordinary life stopped being a factor? What if everyone spoke to them kindly and respectfully as if they were peers? How would they respond? How would they treat others?<br />
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I can't predict with absolute certainty but I can report that on our travels back from camp we had no bickering, no complaining, and lots of happy singing and laughter. When asked if they wanted to go back another time there was a unanimous YES! And when they got off the van there were lots and lots of hugs.<br />
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This might just work on adults as well; after all, who doesn't like to be treated with respect and to have love and kindness poured out on them? It might take a bit more time for the grown-ups. They have a lot more defenses to wash off before the love can get through, but love is pretty strong!<br />
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I wonder where I can get a barrel of this stuff . . .Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-63295464086293491382017-10-02T13:37:00.001-05:002017-10-02T13:38:33.718-05:00Bless the Beasts and the Children<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b><span style="color: #376092; line-height: 115%;">Wednesday, October 4<sup>th</sup> is the Feast of Saint Francis. </span></b><span style="color: #376092;">St. Francis believed that he
could see God in all of creation, and particularly in animals. It’s a great day
to gather the family together and give thanks to God for creation, and to ask
God’s blessing upon the animals: pets, livestock, and even the birds and other
wildlife. We are enriched by all of them - what better reason to give thanks!</span></div>
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<span style="color: #376092; line-height: 115%;">Here are a few ideas you may want to try in your household:</span></div>
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<ul>
<li><span style="color: #0b5394;">Gather all the
family members, including the pets, and have every human lay hands upon the pet.
One person prays, giving thanks to God for creating such a rich variety of
animals and specifically for the love and any other gifts (service, protection,
laughter) that each particular pet brings to the household. </span></li>
<li><span style="line-height: 115%; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="color: #0b5394;">No pets? Gather the
family to give thanks for the backyard wildlife. Before the sun goes down walk
together around the back yard or even the neighborhood, taking note of all the
creatures (or evidence of them) that you see: birds, squirrels, worms,
butterflies, vultures, deer, rabbits, or raccoons. After your walk, gather to
pray. Give thanks to God for the wonders of creation and name all the animals
you saw or thought about on your walk.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="line-height: 115%; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="color: #0b5394;">Artsy-craftsy folks?
Have everyone draw pictures of their favorite animals, cut pictures out of magazines, or turn thumbprints into critters. Then use
the pictures to make a collage and give thanks for God’s great creation,
specifying the animals you made into art.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="line-height: 115%; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="color: #0b5394;">Farm families know the value of their animals, but do you ever stop and give thanks for the blessing of their contributions to your table and your bank account? Gather the family in the barn and praise God together for this source of goodness in your household. Name the cows and the chickens and the goats and the dogs - whatever livestock inhabits and contributes to your household. </span></span></li>
<li><span style="line-height: 115%; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="color: #0b5394;">Live alone with a trusted pet companion? Take some time to really consider how God has blessed you with your pet. Pause to give thanks to God for the many aspects of your blessing.</span></span></li>
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<span style="color: #376092; line-height: 115%;">Integrating time with God
into the everyday events of your life will help you, and other members of your
household, to see God’s constant presence and the blessings upon us. Building
cues into our lives that remind us of God’s love and faithfulness will make us
more grateful and happier people - and the same is true for kids. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #376092; line-height: 115%;"> So celebrate the pets this
week! And pay attention to what else makes your heart swell with gratitude! <span style="font-size: 14pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-64954881333960522932017-08-21T18:06:00.000-05:002017-08-21T20:38:10.123-05:00Serving Breakfast<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The Gospel of John ends with a peculiar tale. After Jesus' resurrection, the disciples returned to Galilee. Once there, as could be expected, they went fishing. And after a long night with nothing to show for it they are headed back to shore when someone on the beach suggests they put their nets into the water on the other side of the boat - and as the nets filled, so did their hearts and they saw that it was Jesus. Peter, ever exuberant, jumps into the water and runs to shore to see his beloved Jesus. The rest return in more normal fashion to find that there is bread, and fish cooking on the grill.<br />
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I wonder if the disciples thought about the breakfast or if they were so overcome with joy to see the one who had come back to them that the breakfast was merely an afterthought. I wonder if following the "Last Supper" with the "First Breakfast" was intentional symbolism on Jesus' part. One phase of the relationship ends there, with the breaking of the bread, and then begins again as he breaks bread and cooks fish over a charcoal fire. A new day as it were - a breaking of the undesired fast of time apart. I don't know. </div>
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I don't know - but I love that Jesus wraps his relationships in meals. And I love that in these crazy, busy, over-stuffed days of the 21st century people still sustain their relationships over meals. After too many hurried encounters between friends, someone usually says "Let's grab lunch. Soon!" and after a few failed attempts, they usually do. And that meal begins another day in their relationship.</div>
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At the church I where I currently work, we serve breakfast to elementary and high school students every Wednesday morning. That's because each Wednesday is a "Late Start" day of school here and for many of these kids, parents still have to show up for work even when school starts late. So we open our doors at the usual school time, and a lovely team of cooks serves up breakfast: a warm and sweet and filling breakfast. After the dishes are cleared, we share updates from the week just passed or worries about the day ahead. We might play games or make a craft or just fiddle with some play dough. Those breakfasts are the source of our relationships with many of these kids, and they know us because we break bread together. We are a special kind of family. Like Jesus and the disciples, no blood ties us together, yet we are bound by love and warm food. May they learn to recognize Jesus in the breaking of the bread with us.</div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-28456027244971945262015-09-22T19:21:00.000-05:002015-09-22T19:21:10.391-05:00Why Christian?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This past weekend I was fortunate to attend a conference in Minneapolis. Fifteen speakers, all women, from a wide variety of backgrounds, came before us and explained why they identify as Christians. Their stories were vastly different, as were their approaches to telling them. Some of them had experienced terrible losses or treatment; others had more conventional paths to faith but with interesting detours along the way. All were passionate, and articulate, and inspiring.<br />
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I loved hearing their stories, and was reminded again how powerful personal stories are for relationships, for instruction, and for guidance. Our stories reveal our truth. There are those who say that stories are not truth, but I believe that the story is far truer than a recitation of the facts, because it reveals the teller's truth. It shows what parts of the events recounted are important to the teller. It tells what part of the event changed the teller. The facts, as told, may be disputable, but the teller's connection to the story is true!<br />
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So when I tell you why I am a Christian I am revealing truth about me to you. And it may look very different than your own experience and feel very different to you than it does to me, but it is my answer, my story, and my truth.<br />
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Yesterday someone shared an experience she had at a church she visited. She said "I hate going to worship where the children are sent away!" It didn't feel like church to her at all when there were no murmurs or shushing happening. I have heard others share the opposite story: "And no one took their child out - it was so loud I couldn't get a thing out of worship there." Both completely true, and probably neither very factually accurate.<br />
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Every family has stories they love to tell:<br />
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<li>When there was a snake in the basement</li>
<li>When someone shoplifted and had to go back and face the music</li>
<li>When the uncles pushed the car to the end of the driveway before starting it so as not to wake the parents</li>
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Each is told from the perspective of the teller and each participant or observer adds details and perspective that enrich the tale. Matthew, Mark, Luke and John recount stories of Jesus' time on earth and include different (and sometimes conflicting) details Our picture of Jesus is enriched and enhanced by these different perspectives.</div>
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You can probably anticipate what I'm going to say: tell your kids stories. Tell them why you're a Christian (or why you're not. . .), or where your spiritual journey has taken you. Tell them about your childhood, your people, your experiences and feelings and changes in direction. Paint them a rich tapestry that includes your truth, varnished and unvarnished. Be authentic. And hear their stories for the truths they reveal. Of course you want to discourage outright falsehoods, but don't get so worried about accuracy that you miss the messages contained within the details. Imagine how little we would know of Jesus if we only had one Gospel. </div>
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I give profound thanks for the stories I heard over the weekend. They pointed out perspectives on Jesus I could never have seen without the lens of their experience. I'd love to hear your story, and I hope someday soon to write mine more fully.</div>
Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-78797481925043280662015-09-15T06:58:00.000-05:002015-09-15T06:58:03.826-05:00High School Dating<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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A conscientious mother recently asked me to write about dating and I've been letting that thought bubble around in the slow-cooker of my brain for a while, wondering if I have anything of value to share on this topic. After all, my own children have both been married for more than three years and had "dated" the men they married for years before the weddings.<br />
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Dating is a scary and exciting passage for teenagers. It is thrilling, and sometimes devastating. It can help a person sort out what they want in a permanent relationship, but it can also open a world of possibilities not apparent from the cocoon of your family. It is hard for us as parents because it is so obviously a step towards leaving the nest.<br />
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I don't think there are any sure-fire formulas for dating success and safety, but I do think there are some common-sense pieces that should be in place before dating begins:<br />
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<li>Your child should have some long-term goals, and have thought about where relationships fit into that. (How much time can be devoted to a relationship? Can your child defer one desire in favor of another? Will they leave an event where there is under-age drinking or illegal drugs are being used?)</li>
<li>Your child should know what a healthy relationship looks like. Ask them who they admire; ask them what they hope their future partnership will look like. This will help them avoid, or at least more quickly realize if they get involved in an unhealthy relationship.</li>
<li>Your child should know how to say and hear "NO". Do not let your child date without having the mutual consent conversation. (Which hopefully started over sharing toys and clothing and isn't a new concept now.)</li>
<li>While they live under your roof, they should not be dating people you haven't met. I also think that they should not be dating people in other life stages (ie no dating people with drivers' licenses until you have one of your own, no dating people with their own apartments until you have your own, etc. And the reverse is also true!)</li>
<li>It goes without saying that they should have been schooled in safe practices related to: alcohol and drugs, sexual activity, driving, violence, manipulation, etc.</li>
<li>It also seems common-sense that they should date on money they earned themselves. Kids who are willing to mow lawns and babysit to have dating money are far more selective in who they spend it on.</li>
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I believe that we were created for community and building healthy relationships make for better communities. Families are our first communities and they should protect us and prepare us for what is to come. </div>
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<li>Don't be hands off with your children's significant others. Invite them to dinner, get to know them. Often the most obnoxious choices will be eliminated simply by seeing them in the context of the family community. </li>
<li>Notice how your child's relationship mimics or digresses from your own relationships. This can be a place to open discussion if you have concerns.</li>
<li>Pray that God will bring a worthy match for your child. A life partner is truly a gift from God.</li>
<li>Make sure your child is aware of what he or she is worth, in your eyes, and in God's eyes. He or she is wonderfully made!</li>
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And lastly - it's easier to sleep in the kid's bed until they get home than to wait up for them. God bless you on this phase of the parental journey. Amen. </div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-25097603356601181092015-09-07T08:46:00.000-05:002015-09-07T08:46:26.164-05:00What am I supposed to do?What kind of conditions would it take for you to put your child's life in danger to escape them? I asked myself this question when the unaccompanied children of Central America and Mexico began flooding across the borders of Texas. I am asking it again this holiday weekend as pictures of drowned toddlers and desperate crowds trying to make it to Europe fill the news.<br />
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What kind of conditions make these incredibly dangerous choices seem like the safer option?<br />
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I cannot, in my comfortable, air-conditioned, and indoor-plumbed home begin to imagine. Even if I were camping this weekend, as so many Americans are, it would be with ample food carried in a motorized vehicle to a campsite with running water and electricity.<br />
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At the start of this holiday weekend the UN announced that there were now over 2 million Syrian refugees; half of them are children. What is happening in their cities and villages that makes this migration the better alternative? If I am honest, I will tell you that I do not want to know. I don't want to know how bad it can be. I can hardly bear the pictures from the camps much less know what is worse than that. It makes me feel helpless; it makes me feel guilty; it makes me feel completely, and utterly, overwhelmed.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZTw3vKk1UgzmoFUabG0hGuur5EPdJQYQl2Tv_B6EX8rdl6hNvkSR5Mxki-TSIkHZANS7cEctbPUu7BBMqCnzoeH4Ens6nzelpL3klEZjopdTbEpSmQ4cC9jQ4XqZZsaOADX-NyxP1kNXy/s1600/refugeecamp.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZTw3vKk1UgzmoFUabG0hGuur5EPdJQYQl2Tv_B6EX8rdl6hNvkSR5Mxki-TSIkHZANS7cEctbPUu7BBMqCnzoeH4Ens6nzelpL3klEZjopdTbEpSmQ4cC9jQ4XqZZsaOADX-NyxP1kNXy/s1600/refugeecamp.jpg" /></a>I don't understand exactly how this came to be but I know it has something to do with 9/11 and oil and ancient in-fighting in the middle east. It really doesn't matter to me any more. I don't care if these people are fleeing from famine or soldiers or devastation caused by natural disasters. Something has to be done. And beyond sending money I am pretty much at a loss. What would I want if I walked with these people?<br />
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I wouldn't want to come to a new country and learn a new language and work at a job way below my former pay grade and capabilities. I wouldn't want to be dependent on people I don't know, whose motives are suspect because I don't really understand their language or their religion. I wouldn't want to dress in strange clothing and eat strange food and be separated from everything and everyone that is home to me. But, I would do all these things if it meant my child could live into adulthood. . .<br />
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because I am a mother,<br />
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Do these desperate mothers and fathers also have an inkling that in saving a child they will lose her? Because that child will become a member of another culture. She will not want to return to the place of the mother or father's childhood. That is a place she remembers only with feelings of fear and deprivation. I hope not because they are already bearing the unbearable.<br />
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It doesn't really matter what your politics tells you about this, or who you think is responsible.<br />
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This. Is. A. Crisis. These are people. They are not trying to take advantage of anyone or anything. They are trying to save their children. They are trying to survive. None of us would do any less.<br />
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I follow Jesus, who was once a refugee child Himself. Jesus teachings tell me that He expects that I will offer a cup of water to the thirsty, a morsel of food to the hungry, and a coat to the naked: simple, practical, realistic stuff. What am I to offer these people who have lost everything? What can, what should I do in the midst of this enormous problem?<br />
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As I wrestled with these questions over the weekend, I heard that Pope Francis asked every parish in Europe to step forward to take in one Syrian family. I like this idea. It brings the crisis down to personal size and it changes the question from "What can I do?" to "What can WE do?"<br />
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What CAN we do?Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-54619120776406139122015-05-29T22:53:00.002-05:002015-05-29T22:53:42.969-05:00Last Day of School<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today was the last day of school in my town. The last day is always an exciting one for children, and a day often filled with many emotions for parents. Parents may be anticipating summer adventures with their kids but they may also be feeling the stress of full-time childcare expenses. Some will feel sadness that another chapter in a child's life is finished or a sense of loss if there was a close partnership with a teacher. There can be waves of nostalgia if the child will be attending another school in the fall. A parent might be dreading the late nights, messy bathrooms and depleted larders that are the earmarks of summers in households with teens. And the last day of high school carries a deep bittersweet feeling all its own.<br />
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Whatever you're feeling, one parenting practice that serves well in times of transition is the "marking of days." A wise friend initiated my family marking of the last day of school.<br />
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It was not unusual, simply a backyard gathering where we stopped and talked over the highlights of the year just ended. The older kids told the younger ones about their 2nd (or 3rd or 4th) grade memories and everyone shared plans and wishes for the summer and the next school year over burgers and chips. It was informal, and familiar (we frequently gathered in that backyard) but it sealed the year somehow, and created a bridge we crossed into summer.<br />
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In Old Testament times significant events were marked by building an altar. The books of Genesis through Judges contain at least 14 stories of building altars. The stories featured famous Biblical <br />
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characters: Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, Aaron, Joshua, Gideon, Saul, David, Solomon, and Elijah. These stories provide us with a simple formula for the marking of days:<br />
<ul>
<li>Stop.</li>
<li>Remember.</li>
<li>Then build something</li>
<li>Out of natural or readily available materials.</li>
</ul>
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Like our informal backyard gathering where we built burgers and remembered, most families probably have some type of ritual that has evolved over the years: going camping, putting the dock in the water, visiting Grandma, or moving seedlings from indoors to the garden. The stopping and doing are important. Adding the remembering and familiar, tangible materials makes it a full-blown marking of the day. It adds meaning and intention to a day already filled with feeling. Marking days builds bridges between times and places.<br />
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You can plan for many important/transitional days throughout the year, creating personal family markings. In doing so you also indirectly prepare for the unexpected days. The Old Testament characters who were building altars were marking the times and places where God "showed up." That was what made the remembering so important. Remember the days that God "showed up" during the school year just ended: the answered prayers, the unexpected perfect response on your tongue to the difficult question asked, the miraculous encounter in nature or with another being. God is still showing up. Mark those days too, and revisit them often.Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-30353878941616657912015-03-28T08:51:00.001-05:002015-03-28T08:51:11.516-05:00Holy Week & Children<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It starts tomorrow, stretching ahead of us like a long and empty road, with obstacles hidden around each curve. For those of us who work in the church, and those of us who grew up in a liturgical tradition, Holy Week is our marathon:<br />
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<ul>
<li>Services on Palm Sunday - complete with palms and perhaps blessing of quilts created for the needy at home and abroad or Passion Sunday - cramming all the week's events into one service. </li>
<li>Then, on Thursday, Maundy (Servant) Thursday, we unpack the Jewishness of Jesus as he celebrates Passover with his friends, the Institution of Holy Communion by Jesus during the Last Supper, and the Servant Leadership of Jesus as he washes the feet of his disciples. All of this concludes with stripping the church of all ornamentation so that on</li>
<li>Good Friday it will be stark and dark and sad as we re-tell the story of Jesus' excruciating death on the cross. In many churches Jesus' Seven Last Wordswill be solemnly read, followed by the toll of a bell and the extinguishing of candles to symbolize the departure of the Light of the World.</li>
<li>In some congregations, there will be an Easter Vigil on Saturday night, replete with fire and drums and darkness followed by light and noise and shouting. Then comes</li>
<li>Sunrise Service which, thanks to Daylight Savings Time regularly occurs in the dark and cold, and additional services attended by infrequently seen people and trumpets flourishes and devoted choir members singing their hearts out.</li>
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It. Is. Exhausting. </div>
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It. Is, Amazing.</div>
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It is church at its best, and at its worst. And these days, it is often ignored by families with children because it is generally ignored by the rest of society. So the kids, if they are regular worship attenders, go from the high of Palm Sunday to the exultation of Easter Resurrection without ever passing through the valley of the shadow of death. And frankly, that's often more comfortable for us as parents. We don't have to answer difficult questions about death or face emotional responses from our children as they put it all together and realize that we, their most important people, will die. We don't like looking at our own mortality either.</div>
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I've been thinking about how parents and Sunday School Teachers should best approach this week. In the midst of my thinking, I stopped and watched a Veggie Tales video called the Easter Carol. It was a droll parody of Dicken's Christmas Carol and most of its delightful humor would be entirely wasted on children BUT, as the Veggie folks so often do, they found a way to summarize the core message for children. And the message of Easter is HOPE.</div>
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And giving our children hope is one of our parenting tasks.</div>
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Giving people the sure and certain hope of the resurrection is one of the church's central tasks.</div>
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Hope is difficult to describe, but easy to recognize. Hope is the lengthening of daylight hours, the rising sap in the trees, the shoots pushing forth from the ground and the fruit trees blooming. It is watching our children grow, and the promise of things to come.</div>
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Easter brings the promise of our own resurrection. It seems to me that this is easier to understand in the full context of the week than as a stand-alone event. It seems easier to bring my children to church and let the leaders there help me and them to unpack these deep and difficult concepts. However, whether you go to church this week or not, mark these days by speaking with your children (regardless of their ages) of fear and suffering and injustice and despair and death, and then remind them, and yourself, of the hope of resurrection. Hosanna & Alleluia!</div>
Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-67064659329407829902014-12-05T08:03:00.002-06:002014-12-05T08:03:51.684-06:00Do Not Be Afraid<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Children of all ages are no strangers to being afraid, and neither are parents. Children are afraid of the dark, big dogs, the possibility of divorce, monsters under the bed, getting their faces wet, and a myriad of other things. Adolescents are afraid that they will always be tallest or shortest or fattest or thinnest, of being rejected when asking someone out on a date, that no one will stop them from their out of control behavior, and that they will have to leave the nest before they are done growing up. Parents are afraid of car accidents, child molesters, bicycles, drugs and death. Being afraid is part of the human condition.<br />
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Into this arena of fear comes the message "Do not be afraid."<br />
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God speaks these words to Abraham, to Hagar, to Isaac, to Jacob. Moses is reminded, Joshua is instructed, and Elijah is commanded. The prophets Isaiah and Jeremiah brought messages from the Lord saying "Do not be afraid." Usually the message is accompanied by "for I am with you."<br />
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I imagine few who heard those words were completely relieved of their fear, but again and again God showed up and proved there was nothing beyond the scope of God's power.<br />
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As we move toward Christmas we will hear these words again. Angels, messengers from God, speaking to Mary, and Joseph, and nameless shepherds on a hillside. The same message, with a twist. "Do not be afraid; I bring you good news!"<br />
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And so as December flies by and Christmas approaches I say to you parents - Do Not Be Afraid!<br />
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Do Not Be Afraid . . .<br />
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<ul>
<li>To be your child's parent. You were not given this child to befriend, you are Mom or Dad!</li>
<li>To let traditions from your childhood that no longer hold meaning die. You can lose all of Christmas suffering through traditions that no one enjoys any longer.</li>
<li>To kill Santa. Or the Elf on the shelf. </li>
<li>To help your child have realistic expectations.</li>
<li>To reach out to others who may be lonely.</li>
<li>To simpllify what you need to for the sake of the Christmas your family wants.</li>
<li>To make your kids wait. . .</li>
</ul>
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There's a lot of pressure on us this time of the year. Pressure to be more, do more, spend more. And the season that should evoke joy can, instead, evoke fear. Fear of not being enough, not decorating (cleaning/baking/wrapping enough) not spending enough. . . </div>
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Do not be afraid Mom and Dad. The Lord has found favor with you and entrusted His beautiful children into your care. Do not be afraid - just love them and glorify God for them! Let them and yourselves know they have nothing to fear for God is with them. </div>
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I Bring You Good News. . .</div>
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<ul>
<li>You are enough</li>
<li>You do enough</li>
<li>Your gifts show your love</li>
<li>It's all about the baby - </li>
<li>The rest is just for fun, and if it's not fun for anyone in your family, don't do it!</li>
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Merry Christmas (it's ok to say - don't be afraid!). May the good news of the Christ child eradicate the fears that creep upon us so stealthily.</div>
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<br />Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-82525038473148665702014-11-14T08:52:00.000-06:002014-11-26T22:36:10.253-06:00In All Circumstances<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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'Tis the season to be THANKFUL, fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.<br />
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There's not much going on to support that idea! Thanksgiving, if mentioned at all, is all about stuffing your face and getting ready to consume bargains on Black Friday. People are keeping scorecards: Who's opening? What time? What's on sale there? Two women in Beaumont, CA set up camp in front of their local Best Buy on November 5, more than three weeks ahead of the big sale. They don't even know specifically what will be on sale, they just want to be first in line.<br />
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In the face of such relentless attempts to stoke our appetites it becomes important to cultivate a grateful heart, first in ourselves, and then in our children. Gratitude is the only antidote to greed. Since there are very few media invitations to gratitude, it's up to us to practice and model gratitude. And practicing gratitude has a huge payoff - peace!<br />
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I live in a small town without even a Walmart to call our own so I was curious to see if the youth of this community, who shop far less than their suburban counterparts, might be more steeped in gratitude. I had a good sample of 20 or so 7th and 8th graders as a captive audience this week. We handed around index cards and asked them to write down something they were thankful for on one side of the card. Then we talked about Paul's injunction to be thankful in all circumstances and asked them to flip their cards over and think about a circumstance where they couldn't imagine being thankful. Then they were asked them to "Stump the Chumps" (me and their pastor) and we looked for ways to be thankful in the scenarios they had dreamed up: someone you love is murdered, a car accident, a bad diagnosis, being bullied, etc. It didn't take long for them to catch on and start finding something to be grateful for in each circumstance, making the "Chumps" unnecessary. At the end, we gave thanks for the things they had initially written down on their cards. Each of the 20 had chosen one of three things: parents, families, and friends.<br />
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I was discouraged that they had come to the table with so little gratitude no apparent awareness of the gifts of shelter, education, food, health, or a host of other possible choices, Still, I was very glad that they appreciated their relationships more than their cell phones. And I was encouraged that after our exercise I detected a note of embarrassment as student after student said family or friends or parents.<br />
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Gratitude, for most of us, is more an ingrained habit than an inborn talent. Family is a perfect context for learning to be grateful. The old-fashioned practice of saying grace before meals is a gratitude practice. Simply reciting "God is great. God is good. And we thank God for our food." creates an awareness that food is something to be appreciated. Stopping to pray before meals and freely expressing specific gratitudes for specific circumstances is also a good way to teach/learn/practice gratitude.<br />
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Other natural contexts within the family might include:<br />
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<ul>
<li>Requiring good manners: saying thank you when receiving a gift (whether that gift is a birthday celebration, a basket of clean laundry, a warm drink on a cold day, or a ride to a friend's house.)</li>
<li>Raising awareness using natural triggers: giving thanks for first responders when hearing sirens, speaking thankfully of income sources when getting cash at the ATM, appreciating good service when it happens, good health when engaging in active recreation</li>
<li>Focusing awareness: simply asking familiy members to think of one thing they are grateful for each day and to share it, or put up a white board for keeping track of blessings</li>
</ul>
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I have kept a gratitude journal off and on for many years. Though I haven't been consistent, it is fun to look back and see what inspired my gratitude in other stages of life: a child's long nap, a windy day for drying beach towels, prepared food in the freezer, an accident avoided, good medical care, helpful friends, wisdom from my mother or father or child, a good book, an inspiring sermon, a reminder, no cavities, a telephone call, a day without driving, and so on.</div>
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Though it may be obvious, the biggest gift of the gratitude practice is that is cultivates an awareness of God, and of God's goodness. It is hard to comprehend the immensity of God's goodness, but itemizing our daily gifts helps us see God at work in our lives - and in that grateful state be immunized from the germs of greed that draw us away from God. In the language of bumper stickers:</div>
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May you know gratitude and peace this season!Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-56147428043301181962014-10-11T06:45:00.001-05:002014-10-11T06:45:16.591-05:00AccompanimentI have been thinking about the theme of accompaniment for a few weeks now - inspired by journey stories of the Old Testament and God's accompaniment on those journeys, and my own reflections on reaching the milestone of living a year in a new place and God's accompaniment in transition.<br />
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Accompaniment is a word that has musical connotations for me. One who provides musical accompaniment has a complex role, being present in the background, sometimes supporting or enhancing, sometimes leading, and sometimes building a bridge from one section to another. If you have been to a silent movie where the piano player sets the tone of the scene through the musical score, or listened to a soloist sing a song with significant changes in tempo or key, supported through them by the instrumental accompaniment, you can recognize the work and artistry of accompaniment.<br />
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Many times the role of accompanist is deemed subordinate to the role of soloist. After all, at the end of the song, it's the soloist who takes the bow. The most gracious stars will acknowledge their accompanist but the applause is still mostly for the star - isn't he or she great for acknowledging the piano player or the chorus?<br />
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As you read the epic stories of the Old Testament, you can see God's accompaniment supporting, leading and building bridges for the main characters: going with Adam and Eve as they are banished from the garden, leading Joseph to plan and prepare for a time of famine and allowing Moses to part the waters and create a bridge of dry land to the wilderness on the way to freedom.<br />
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God has been the accompanist to my personal "Life Song" as well - supporting, leading, and providing the bridge from one section to another. And what a great accompanist: supporting me with food, shelter, relationships, work and meaning - the essentials of life. God continues to be the heartbeat that keeps me moving, leading me forward when I would linger too long or holding me back when I would rush forward too soon. God has bridged the segments of my life: from married to single, from mother to empy-nester, from a city in Texas to a small town in Minnesota. God has accompanied me, in the fullest sense of the word.<br />
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Am I, created in the image of God, supposed to provide accompaniment as well? Am I supposed to support, lead, and bridge for others? What does it look like to accompany children, spouses, siblings, parents or friends on their journeys the way that God accompanies me? I believe this may be a skill and an attitude to be cultivated in a culture that teaches us to look out for #1. While many of you may already do this as naturally as breathing (I will be watching and learning!) the rest of us will need to learn to accompany. As we seek to accompany one another, what will result? I'm thinking it may be a orchestra!<br />
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-12891532492429064702014-10-03T11:40:00.003-05:002014-10-11T06:45:41.894-05:00Homecoming<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It's homecoming week in my little town. I don't know how many people actually come home for it, or how many people ever left but it has a lovely ring to it: homecoming. In the midst of our local celebrations I've been thinking a lot about "homecoming":<br />
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This month marks the anniversary of the death of a friend who introduced me to another use of the word homecoming: the day they brought their adopted child home. Their family celebrated Homecoming Day with all the excitement most birthdays garner.<br />
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Another homecoming happened this week: a child of my former church, now 17, abducted by her non-custodial mother 12 years ago was found in Mexico and returned to Texas. It felt like a homecoming to all of us who have waited and prayed these last 12 years, but to her it must feel as if she has been torn from her home.<br />
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Resurrection</i> returned from its summer break and the haunting melody of its theme song adds a bit of melancholy background music to my week. Searching for the source of the theme song I found this <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k84QxVJd0tI" target="_blank">video</a> of the song. It's called<i> Coming Home, Part 2,</i> which led me to another kind of homecoming: the soldiers.<br />
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The homecoming experiences of returning soldiers must be as myriad as their service experiences; none of them are coming home unchanged. Is it still home when you are different?</div>
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Just over a week ago I "virtually" celebrated the homecoming of a friend who had a brain tumor removed. She's not home free, but she's home from the hospital and healing.</div>
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When I went to my high school class reunion this summer another reality set in - most of us had no home there any longer. Parents had moved away, passed away, or were infirm and cared for at the "nursing home". The houses we lived in back then were occupied by others, or standing empty.<br />
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Though it clearly dates me, and kind of embarrasses me, I have always resonated with the poetry of John Denver's <i>Rocky Mountain High: </i></div>
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"He was born in the summer of his twenty-seventh year,<br />
Coming home, to a place he'd never been before.<br />
Left yesterday behind him,<br />
You might say he was born again.<br />
Might say he'd found the key to every door."</blockquote>
Home is the place where we have the keys. The place where we know the rules, and where things are kept, and what the idioms and the silences mean; a place where we understand the values and the context. Sometimes home is a place we recognize, even if it's a place we've never been before.<br />
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Throughout my life, church has been home. Though my childhood was spent moving from place to place, church remained familiar. Though the buildings, the liturgies, the preachers and the hymns changed, God the source of all that is home remains. Wherever I find myself, church is coming home to a place I've never been before, and one I've never left.<br />
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I no longer live where my children grew up, but they have homes of their own, and church homes where they belong. My mother hasn't lived anywhere that I ever lived for over 35 years. When my daughters visit me, or I visit my mother, we are not coming home, but when we worship together we are at home, with God: our true home.<br />
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Where is your homecoming?</div>
Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-10917057779003928252014-09-23T10:54:00.000-05:002014-09-23T10:54:24.159-05:00Blind Spots<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This past Sunday the children at my church learned the story of Joseph and the Coat of Many Colors. One part of this story has always left me perplexed: what was Jacob thinking, giving a fancy coat to one and not to the others?! What an extraordinary parenting gaffe! Especially given that Jacob himself was so beset by sibling rivalry that he stole his twin brother's birthright when they were young.<br />
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Unfortunately, even the best parents have blind spots. As a parent who is mostly looking in the rear view mirror these days, I can see that I probably over-shared with my children. I probably caused them to worry about things that I should have worried about alone, or with other adults. I was probably too straightforward in shooting down some of their dreams. I am also pretty sure that they told me about it while it was happening but I couldn't always see their point of view. I had parenting blind spots.<br />
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It's always easier to see other people's blind spots. I have watched parents do the same thing over and over, expecting it to work "this time." I have seen parents favoring one child, or one gender of child over the other, or conversely expecting more of one than the other. I have seen parents live vicariously through their kids by pushing them into sports or music or even careers they wish they had had. I wonder what other people have watched me do.<br />
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I suspect that Reuben, or Dan, or one of the mothers told Jacob he was making a mistake by favoring Joseph over the others. Did they point out to the patriarch that he wasn't being fair? And did that parenting mistake imbue Joseph with the confidence he needed for the rest of his journey? Did that extra bit of love fill up his self-worth so that when his brothers later came to him in need he was able to be gracious and merciful? Jacob's blind spot caused his favorite son to be sold into slavery but it seems it may also have formed Joseph's character for a particular future.<br />
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Which brings me back to a familiar theme in my thinking: God can use evil (or failure or shortcoming or disappointment or mistakes) for good. I am not the final form-er of my child's character, an important one to be sure, but God is always present, with me and with my children.<br />
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So I can float on God's abiding presence for another day. I may have blind spots but God sees all. I can do my best, and leave the rest to God. What a wonderful way to travel through this river of parenthood!Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-91725920221228002762014-08-29T05:28:00.000-05:002014-08-29T05:28:30.128-05:00Labor Day Musings<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I love Labor Day. It's a day off that for me carries no obligation but to rest from my labors. The heyday of the union is over, unless you consider this: In Minnesota Home Health Care and Child Care Providers have just won the right to organize and unionize. These are the people who provide the services traditionally served up free within families. They are bringing to light the value of that labor which is so often uncompensated or undercompensated. I don't know where the fight will go, or what the consequences will be, but it does focus a light on family issues.<br />
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What if parents formed a Labor Union? They certainly labor! And for many, the working conditions and safety standards aren't all they might be. What if parents collectively bargained for better wages, benefits, working conditions, safety practices and respect? What if they bound themselves together for the greater good? What would that look like?<br />
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I was once employed in a workplace that was in the middle of unionizing. I remember sitting in those meetings and thinking that the zeal of the organizers echoed both the Early Church (see Acts) and the Hippies of the Sixties (see Woodstock). In my mind I was singing along with the Youngbloods:</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Come on People now,<br />
Smile on your Brother,<br />
Everybody get together<br />
Try to love one another<br />
Right now.</blockquote>
(For you readers too young or too old to remember this song, you can listen to it <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2IbNe4x6hg" target="_blank">here</a>, just for grins.)<br />
Many years later, this song sounds like an anthem for parents too. . . maybe more along the lines of:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Come on little people now,<br />
Don't hit your brother,<br />
Everybody stay together,<br />
Gonna love one another<br />
Right now. Right NOW. RIGHT NOW!</blockquote>
Ok, that's just facetious, but my point remains - do we need unions to protect parents, or families?<br />
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I am living closer to family farms than I have in a long while, and as I observe life in my new community I realize that families are by nature "unionized" a bit. Everyone has to get together for the common good, and sometimes love is the only glue that could get them through the mind-boggling choices that have to be made: Who stays on the farm and who gets a job in town? Who takes care of Mom or Dad in their old age or who pays for a nursing home? Should I have to pay the same rate of rent for my land to my brother as I would to a stranger? Should I charge my nephew the same price I would charge a stranger? How would the answers to those questions change if "everybody got together." Maybe it's not just families that need to organize, but whole communities. . .<br />
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What do you think?Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-42913316206858990542014-07-03T14:50:00.000-05:002014-07-03T14:50:34.805-05:00Independence Day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">Late last year I moved to a community that has a massive Independence Day celebration. As I write this it is almost here and I have been reflecting on independence as the big day approaches. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">To become a nation America had to become independent of her "parent" state Great Britain. In order to do that, the colonies had to rebel against that "parent" and begin making her own decisions about governance, taxation, and a whole host of other topics. Does any of this sound familiar to you? Is anyone in your home rebelling? If so, rejoice! Your child is on the road to independence! Rebellion is one sign that your child believes that he or she can function independently.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; line-height: 18px;">At the Boston Tea Party the chant "No taxation without representation" could be heard all the way to Great Britain. Your child's cry of rebellion may also revolve around not having a say in the decisions concerning his or her own life. You may know best (Great Britain certainly believed they knew best!) but you may not. Your child may truly know better, or they may need to make some mistakes in order to learn to make better decisions. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; line-height: 18px;">The American colonies, the children who grew up to become the United States of America, believed that they could form a "more perfect union" and they declared their independence, beginning with these words:</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation</span> </blockquote>
<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">The document goes on to spell out the grievances of the colonies, how Great Britain NEVER LET THEM DO ANYTHING (supply your child's particular grievances in place of those) and therefore must:</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana,sans-serif" font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">[S]olemnly
publish and declare, that these united colonies are . . . free and independent
states;</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">And then comes a list of what they CAN now do: make war and peace, contract alliances and establish commerce, "and to do all other acts and things which independent
states may of right do." (Read: get a job; pay their own rent, car insurance, and dental bills; deal with the consequences of their own decisions; and find a husband or wife to partner with them in building this new life.)</span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">I say this with tongue-in-cheek, but what if this declaration had been taken seriously? What if Great Britain had acted in the children/colonies best interests and instead of trying to block them, encouraged them and helped them to establish their independence? The American Revolution had fifty thousand casualties.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">If you consider your child's rebellion as a transition to independence, can you collaborate with them in declaring their independence? Can you listen to their grievances and evaluate their validity? Can you help them establish a list of items for which they are now responsible? Negotiate some deadlines?</span><br />
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<span style="color: #3d6776; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18px;">It's easier to parent as Great Britain did - ruling with authority, ignoring or punishing rebellion - but this choice can be costly. Better to follow the model established by God "the Father" and love unconditionally, allow free choices, advise when consulted, and be waiting with open arms when they return to us in success or failure. Happy Independence Day!!!</span>Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-74752808329696191712014-06-15T17:20:00.000-05:002014-06-15T17:20:20.927-05:00Summertime. . . Everyone is out of school by now, I think. I ran into a list of summer activities over at PBSkids and <br />
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many of the suggestions brought a flood of sweet memories. I loved summer vacation both as a child, and as a parent with children at home. Lately though, it seems that there's not much vacation in summer vacation. Vacation can take many forms - and all of them are little sabbaths. Summertime activities can be mini-vacations or mini-sabbaths. Here are some of my favorites:<br />
<ol>
<li><b>Catch fireflies</b> (aka lightening bugs). This one elicited more of a parent memory than a childhood one. My girls will probably remember how the fireflies could blink in time to the Blue Danube Waltz. Da-da-da-da blink-blink blink-blink. . .</li>
<li><b>Read a book under, or in, a tree.</b> I spent many hours reading in a treehouse during elementary school summer vacations. I never once thought to invite my mom to join me but I would have been thrilled if she had. . .</li>
<li><b>Go on a family bike ride.</b> Last week a kindergarten child arrived at Vacation Bible School on his bike. Mom was just behind, pulling a toddler trailer. Everyone was all smiles!</li>
<li><b>Have a picnic.</b> These days we have such elegant facilities at home that we don't often pack up the food and go to the park but we should, even if it's just doing the rest area instead of McD's on the family vacation. Great people-watching and interesting conversations happen when we leave the backyard. . .</li>
<li><b>Go stargazing. </b>Take a blanket and some bug repellent and look up at the sky. Wonder together about God and heaven and all of creation. Nothing inspires those conversations like stars. . .</li>
<li><b>Skip stones at a creek or pond.</b> Help your child learn to be still by bringing his or her focus to a single activity. Let the breeze and the water and your child's concentration speak to you and quiet your own soul. . .</li>
</ol>
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There are <a href="http://www.pbs.org/parents/summer/camp-pbs-parents-summer-bucket-list-2014/" target="_blank">14 more ideas on the list </a>but the point here isn't to keep you busy all summer. It is point you toward some core parenting and faith ideas:</div>
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<li>Good parenting isn't an accident - it requires planning, participation, and practice. </li>
<li>Passing on the faith is done in those regular, small, moments where you speak from your heart.</li>
</ul>
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Summer will lend itself to strengthening your parenting if you allow yourself to grab some sabbath rest with your children. They are paying attention to you all the time, and never more attentively than when you are out of your routine. Take advantage, and have a great summer!</div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-18406799387826951612014-05-06T08:33:00.001-05:002014-08-29T07:37:29.891-05:00Folding Towels in a Sweet Way<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 115%;">"Spirituality doesn't look like sitting down
and meditating. Spirituality looks like folding the towels in a sweet way and
talking kindly to the people in the family even though you've had a long day.
It's enfolded into the act of parenting. You fold the towels in a sweet way. It
doesn't take extra time."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333; line-height: 115%;">Sylvia Boorstein from “What
We Nurture”</span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 20.700000762939453px;">I've been sitting with this quote for a while, thinking about all its implications. . . </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 20.700000762939453px;">"Talking kindly to the people in the family." And I would add talking to <i>everyone </i>kindly. This was underscored by a recent training for registering</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 20.700000762939453px;"> and greeting participants of a large meeting, verifying their voting credentials, etc. The woman who coordinated the meeting encouraged us to greet and welcome people with as much love and kindness as possible. Our instructions included a reminder that if a check-in doesn't go smoothly, someone made a mistake, but it can be fixed. Just reassure the person in front of you that it can be fixed, and don't worry about who messed up. That's folding towels sweetly. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.700000762939453px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Talking kindly to people . . . even though you've had a long day." Pretty much everyone over the age of ten has a long day, every day. To do lists are lengthy, sleep cycles are short, the calendar is full, and maintenance is almost a fulltime job for most families. It's useful to remember that we have a choice in how we respond. If we choose to respond kindly as a matter of course, we will be able to talk kindly when we're tired, or worried, or distracted. And, as she says, it doesn't take any more time. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"You fold the towels in a sweet way." I don't usually think of folding towels as either sweet or spiritual but recently, folding napkins for an upcoming meal with people I cared for deeply, I understood. I was folding them for people I loved, and it was a joy to do it carefully, and lovingly. I was focused on the other instead of myself which made the chore a pleasure. And it didn't take any extra time.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Spirituality is a vague word. Some people would call it religion. Others would say faith. For me, spirituality is recognizing the meaning and relationships inherent in whatever we are doing. That's probably why it's impossible to be a parent without bouncing against issues of religion and faith and spirituality. Parenting must be spiritual because it is both meaningful and relational. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">So if you would be spiritual, or a loving parent, and you can't find time for "sitting down and meditating," start folding your towels sweetly. Recognize what your task means and who that task impacts. Infuse your cho</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">res, your actions, and your work with kindness. </span>Those sweetly folded towels will enfold your child after baths, after swimming, and every time her hands are washed.<span style="font-family: inherit;"> Your touch is present in that sweetly folded towel, caressing your child or spouse or guest.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">It may initially take some effort, but like all habits, once formed it will become part of you and you will be able to fold your towels sweetly; you will spend your "doing" time thinking of who your task will affect. That is being spiritual. </span></div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-41715350990598503702014-04-19T08:33:00.000-05:002014-04-19T08:33:48.148-05:00Last Supper LoveThis Thursday night of Holy Week we visited again the story of Jesus washing his disciple's feet and sharing the bread and wine with them in a new way. As I listened to the story of that event, and heard my pastor's sermon, an interesting twist took hold of my mind. I realized how clearly Jesus modeled love for us.<br />
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I have previously written about the <i>5 Love Languages, </i>a "system" developed by Dr. Gary Chapm for communicating love to people you care about. He suggests that there are five different ways we give and receive love:<br />
<ul>
<li>Words of Affirmation (speaking)</li>
<li>Acts of Service (serving)</li>
<li>Giving/Receiving Gifts (sharing)</li>
<li>Quality Time (being present)</li>
<li>Physical Touch (touching)</li>
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Think through the story of the Last Supper.* In his last hours of life Jesus stays present with his friends. He washes their feet as if he were their servant: he is serving them, and he is also touching them. Then, he shares a meal with them, literally giving them the gift of himself: "this is my body. . . this is my blood." And, in both accounts, he speaks his love: "I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer," and "Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another." All the expressions of love - given for each to understand in his own language.</div>
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This is the essence of love - the speak the language of the other. As parents of infants we struggle to interpret every cry, every garbled word, and every pointing or reaching toward an object before our child has language. We try to imagine what they are saying, even though they don't have the language to express it. Once our kids become fluent in speech, we sometimes begin to take what they say at face-value, just as we do with other people. We start to lead with our preferred language, loving them in ways we are comfortable, instead of in their language.</div>
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The 5 Love Language followers advocate learning your child's preferred language (or that of your spouse, friend, co-worker, etc.) but if you don't know which language they prefer, take a cue from Jesus and try them all. You'll know when you hit the right one! It may not be your most preferred way to show love, but the essence of love is for the other, not for the self. That is the whole message of Jesus' death and resurrection. It is <i>for you</i>. The other. Not for Jesus; <i>for you</i>. This is love.</div>
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Blessed Easter to you. May you know that <i>you </i>are loved!</div>
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*You can find footwashing in John 13 and the rest of the meal in Luke 22 if it's a bit foggy.</div>
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<br />Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-82622878392039760452014-04-11T22:11:00.002-05:002014-04-11T22:11:51.317-05:00Telling Stories<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">We are moving toward Holy Week and the story that makes our Christian faith what it is. It's a story that could not be kept under wraps. It's a story filled with love and hate and betrayal and confusion and evil and passion. It is told again and again, each teller emphasizing the parts that mean the most to him or her. Another person tells the same story but with a different emphasis. Listening to, and believing, that story is what makes us Christians.</span><br />
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">What if, as it is recorded in Mark 16, "they went out and fled from the tomb, for terror and amazement had seized them; and <u>they said nothing to anyone</u>, for they were afraid. What if God's great saving story had been kept secret? No one alive today would know it. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“Stories have to be told or they die, and when they die, we can't remember who we are or why we're here.” </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">― </span><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4711.Sue_Monk_Kidd" style="background-color: white; color: #666600; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;">Sue Monk Kidd</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/3275013" style="color: #666600; text-decoration: none;">The Secret Life of Bees</a> </i></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs-BWg7P495WDTkW7tKMUfSknonkYrWTtVasPzEZiSipSBVtxOVskkiWGNKwhRNEgu4aROABth2yl0JARdBabKxHXuZVsxVn7wIO2FhK-NFkh9NDC-Sg4CmzQ7JNV3kotXSrnc6dgM2U17/s1600/EggHuntInSnow+(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs-BWg7P495WDTkW7tKMUfSknonkYrWTtVasPzEZiSipSBVtxOVskkiWGNKwhRNEgu4aROABth2yl0JARdBabKxHXuZVsxVn7wIO2FhK-NFkh9NDC-Sg4CmzQ7JNV3kotXSrnc6dgM2U17/s1600/EggHuntInSnow+(2).jpg" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">Not every story has the significance of the Easter story, but our stories tell us and others who we are, how we got here and maybe even why. And the why we are here may be as significant as our purpose for the planet, or as simple as why we live where we live. Every story gives a context. And a story compiled from facts or lies without context is utterly forgettable</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">As parents, we can greatly enrich our children's lives by telling them stories from our childhoods. It probably doesn't matter that it snowed on my hidden Easter eggs in 1961 or that the dog ate all of the caramel rolls I made for Easter breakfast in 1990 but it provides a younger-me shape for my children to see. It creates a context to fit mommy into and gives clues to motivation, and emotional responses. It both helps me to look back and see where I came from and helps my children see me more completely. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></span><span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">Stories can provide context for holidays, and holidays can be wonderful contexts for stories. You undoubtedly remember an Easter from years past. Go tell your child a story from another Easter or tell a tale from when she was a small child and too young to remember. Weave your stories together into a history and a context and let them live on from generation to generation.</span></span><br />
Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-18162033372334633022014-04-05T09:49:00.002-05:002014-04-05T13:44:21.569-05:00Learning to Manage His Mad<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I was recently astounded to hear of a child in kindergarten being sent to an alternative school for two weeks. It was hard to imagine what a five year old child could do that would result in an in-school suspension. I still don't know all the details, and don't need to, but I love how his grandmother described the issue: "He needs to learn to manage his mad."<br />
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One of the gifts we need to give our children is to teach them to "manage their mad". Ideally, we will teach our children to handle their anger in a healthy way. Unfortunately, it's another one of those tricky lessons that we may not have fully mastered ourselves before we become parents. It's hard to know where anger is healthy, and where it is destructive.Many of us grew up in homes where anger was unacceptable. We learned from an early age to stuff it down deep inside and never give in to it. Others of us grew up in homes where unbridled anger was the norm; self-indulgent rage was tolerated, and contagious. How was anger handled in your family when you were young?<br />
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At some point on my journey I stored away a bit of Biblical advice: "In your anger, do not sin." This wise saying is found in Ephesians, right beside the better known "Do not let the sun go down on your anger." What a great way to measure how you manage your mad! Anger that causes you to do harm to another or turn away from God is probably unhealthy. Jesus models anger as a healthy response to injustice and lets his anger spur him to act well: healing, helping, bringing about change. <br />
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So how do you teach your child to manage the mad? Here are a few useful ideas:<br />
<ol>
<li>Teach your children to name their emotions. Children who can differentiate between angry, frustrated and scared are well on their way to managing their mad. </li>
<li>Teach them acceptable behaviors to use when they are angry: stepping away, writing about their anger, or working the anger out on a tetherball or punching bag are all acceptable ways to discharge anger. Hitting your brother or sister is not.</li>
<li>Help them channel righteous anger. Don't dismiss what they are angry about or teach them to distract themselves. If they think it's terrible that someone is bullying another child, help them find a way to help. Channel their energy, talents and innate sense of justice.</li>
<li>Model appropriate angry behavior. Don't hit, rage, or stuff your feelings when you're angry. Model what you'd like to see your children do. (And don't provoke your child's anger for your own entertainment. That's another whole post.)</li>
<li>Establish consequences for mismanaged anger: doing the chores of the sibling he hit, paying for the item she broke, losing privileges. That can also mean rewarding good anger management, perhaps a word of praise or some one-on-one time when you see your child walk away from a fight.</li>
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Anger management is an important life skill. Mismanaged anger will harm your child's relationships with others or will head down a self-destructive path. Well managed anger will bring about positive change in the world. Like many other important life skills it is best taught intentionally, not in reaction to something that has already happened. May you have success on this important voyage.</div>
Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-83544544743441261972014-03-21T08:49:00.000-05:002014-04-12T16:29:41.175-05:00Loving Your Enemies<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Fred Phelps is dead. The man who led a church in Kansas to picket the funerals of American soldiers and Hollywood celebrities in an attempt to proclaim God's rage against America has crossed over to the other side.<br />
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This is where it gets hard to be a follower of Jesus. Jesus tells us we are to love our enemies. Most of us would love to have a chance to picket old Fred's funeral and get the word out that God loves everyone, not just people who Fred approves. That, however, would not be a loving way to behave. And my leader, Jesus, calls me to love outside my circle of family and friends (everyone does that!) and to go the extra mile and love my enemies. And Jesus makes it clear that love is not an emotion; love is an action. In this case love is restraining oneself from doing an unloving action. Love is recognizing that in spite of the terrible person Fred Phelps seemed to be, he mattered to some people. He will be missed and perhaps even mourned by those people.<br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">And though it's hard to swallow, God loves Fred Phelps. God who looks upon the hearts of the people knows why this man who was once a civil rights lawyer became a hatemonger who believed he honored God by preaching hate. In 1999 Phelps responded to criticism from Jerry Falwell in the L.A. Times, saying, "He's saying I preach hate? You
can't preach the Bible without preaching hate! Looky here, the hatred of God is an attribute of the
Almighty," he said. "It means he's determined to punish the wicked
for their sins!" </span><br />
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Today I imagine Fred standing in front of God Almighty and feeling God's immense love enfolding him. I admit that I wish that he will have great regret for the life he lived before he feels that peace which passes all understanding. He has misrepresented Christians everywhere but, in the end, I want to follow Jesus closely enough to hope that he will find peace.<br />
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I love the Lord and I know that he is loving Fred, forgiving Fred, and healing Fred. So with no feelings of love toward Fred Phelps I write this, hoping that we who know God to be loving and forgiving can let old Fred go without any retribution. If I hate and renounce Fred and consign him to hell I am simply being Fred on a different campaign. So rest in peace Fred. I won't be picketing your funeral or spitting on your grave. God will handle you; I don't have to.<br />
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I don't know how to teach kids to love their enemies but I know that part of my understanding of this concept comes from understanding these two basic precepts:<br />
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<li>Love is an action, not a feeling.</li>
<li>Vengence belongs to God.</li>
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I think it's important to learn and teach this. It makes for a far more peaceful life. Hate consumes and love nourishes. Why not choose love?</div>
<br />Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-85144225362987392222014-03-13T21:30:00.002-05:002014-03-13T21:30:49.752-05:00The Creative Child<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYefHnrTNtZJWN2NKlmt0-8DHHHHzOJODTil6PLhhcJHmPg25xXo1g8JzK2Fe1E5S_08BwUv_WHmNuiZ07Kgz8XYqeYRtNqdhwrgp1I8AlTbXsK8o1ts3q78104m65HnnCE1vVMk98pdNt/s1600/Paper-Dresses-by-4-Year-Old-Girl-2.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYefHnrTNtZJWN2NKlmt0-8DHHHHzOJODTil6PLhhcJHmPg25xXo1g8JzK2Fe1E5S_08BwUv_WHmNuiZ07Kgz8XYqeYRtNqdhwrgp1I8AlTbXsK8o1ts3q78104m65HnnCE1vVMk98pdNt/s1600/Paper-Dresses-by-4-Year-Old-Girl-2.png" height="200" width="196" /></a></div>
A couple of weeks ago I ran into a wonderful mommy-blog from a woman who has a significantly creative child. She has documented their creative endeavors of paper dressmaking with words and pictures - <a href="http://www.fashionbymayhem.com/" target="_blank">celebrating this special child.</a> Shortly thereafter, hanks to a blog I subscribe to (<a href="http://storylineblog.com/" target="_blank">Donald Miller</a>), I found another blogger (<a href="http://www.penelopetrunk.com/" target="_blank">Penelope Trunk</a>) who turned me on to yet another blogger (<a href="http://www.bulletproofmusician.com/" target="_blank">Dr. Noa Kageyama</a>) <span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 1.2;">where I found an entry on bias against creativity. In this <a href="http://www.bulletproofmusician.com/do-we-have-a-hidden-bias-against-creative-people/" target="_blank">entry</a> Dr. Kageyama reports on a research project about creative children. The researchers behind this project identified characteristics of the most creative children.</span><br />
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The creative child. . .<br />
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<li><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 19.200000762939453px;">Makes up the rules as he/she goes along</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 19.200000762939453px;">Impulsive</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 19.200000762939453px;">Nonconformist</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 19.200000762939453px;">Emotional</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 19.200000762939453px;">Takes chances</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 19.200000762939453px;">Tends not to know own limitations and tries to do what others think is impossible</span></span></li>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 20px;">And the least creative children are more. . .</span><br />
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<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Tolerant</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Reliable</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Practical</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Logical</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Understanding</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 20px;">Good</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 20px;">-natured</span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 20px;">Sincere</span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 20px;">Dependable</span></li>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20px;">Guess which group teachers favor? Not surprisingly it's the tolerant, reliable, practical, logical, understanding, good-natured, sincere and dependable children from the least creative group. </span><br />
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20px;">Now, with my new-found knowledge of </span><a href="http://baptismalfloating.blogspot.com/2014/02/what-kind-of-smart-is-that.html" style="font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20px;" target="_blank">Multiple Intelligences</a><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20 px;"> I wasn't surprised to read this. Teachers are devoted to education, which is more about putting knowledge in than pulling creativity out, and they necessarily have many students, which makes conformity desirable. Unfortunately, for some children, their creative side interferes with conformity, which disrupts conventional classrooms and causes them to feel there's something wrong with them.</span><br />
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20 px;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lora, serif; line-height: 20 px;">And shadowing all of my thoughts is the recent death of Phillip Seymour Hoffman who, judging by his career and unfortunate death, was incredibly creative (and impulsive, unaware of his own limitations, nonconformist, risk-taking and emotional.) I don't want to stifle a child's creativity, but I certainly wish to keep him safe.</span><br />
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Every child is created in the image of God, and God is most certainly creative! So the creative child is no more or less valuable than any other child, but that creativity needs to be nurtured, and celebrated. Pay attention, you'll be amazed by the ideas your creative child generates. Take said child to museums, libraries, laboratories, and landforms. Find opportunities to experience different cultures, art studios and the kitchen. Visit any place that will supply her with new information to fuel her imagination. Allow extra time to transition from the world of ideas to the world of boxes and lines. Make sure that he or she knows you love his or her creativity, that it's one of the qualities you appreciate. It is both a burden and a privilege to rear a creative child; when in doubt, turn to the creator of us all. I can guarantee you'll hatch an idea that will help you create a suitable environment to foster your child's creativity. Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-52946167583611978332014-03-06T07:33:00.000-06:002014-03-06T07:33:30.605-06:00The Faith of a Celebrity<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWt5vN5rJz2Imp_8r56kWC55TgfYiAdOqcEoVQv8vYn5zjE-mhZGhQzjy0Dp9VjK1JDUl8uVwvHg9fcl_XmCUx8aZ7gQlZfM_wnASPPLj92xfrvy1RBcoEcQU5H1YEbNQzNwbHoZB2OaWX/s1600/best+actor.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWt5vN5rJz2Imp_8r56kWC55TgfYiAdOqcEoVQv8vYn5zjE-mhZGhQzjy0Dp9VjK1JDUl8uVwvHg9fcl_XmCUx8aZ7gQlZfM_wnASPPLj92xfrvy1RBcoEcQU5H1YEbNQzNwbHoZB2OaWX/s1600/best+actor.jpg" /></a></div>
Wow! Matthew McConaughey thanked God in his Oscar acceptance speech Sunday night. Various headlines I read implied that this was unusual because a) he was in Hollywood (where everyone is Godless) b) he's a bad-boy star, known as a party animal c) he's white or d) it was inappropriate.<br />
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I think it's wonderful that Mr. McConaughey expressed his gratitude. I think that acknkowledging that there is a force stronger than his own personal ability in the midst of one of the most exciting moments of his life is exemplary. I hope that many people will emulate him, and let God be their true north, the object of their gratitude. What I don't want to see is Matthew McConaughey become a "celebrity Christian."<br />
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God does not require celebrity endorsements. Celebrities, like all of us, are dust, and to dust they shall return. Mere mortals, no closer to God than ordinary people, they are useful when they create conversation about gratitude and faith, but certainly not necessary for that to happen. Their influence is limited because celebrity is fleeting. Today's Best Actor is only as important as his last role.<br />
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As parents, we are the most important stars in our children's lives. How they see and follow God has a lot more to do with what we do on a daily basis than what the Best Actor says or does in response to God. Do our children see us being grateful to God? Do they know that we consult God with major life decisions? Do they see your relationship with God occupying a high spot on your priority list? If they do, then you will have a far more lasting effect on the world than any words spoken by Matthew McConaughey at the Oscars. <br />
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Maybe we should be striving to make God a celebrity in our household. Does your child know as much about God as she does about the latest tween heart-throb? Do we spend as much time in conversation about where God is at work in the world or what God would have us do in the face of a given situation as we spend discussing the prospects for the Vikings, Cowboys, Rangers, Twins, Longhorns, Badgers, or Gold Medals at the Olympics?<br />
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God is, in fact, a rock star! God is Creator, Friend and Wisdom, the source of all that we need. Credentials like that require no celebrity endorsement to be made known, only the acknowledgement of ordinary people in ordinary circumstances. God remains, when all else turns to dust. God alone is worthy of our worship and our gratitude. Is that obvious to your kids?Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2760177057075194053.post-63879793856726023092014-02-20T21:48:00.000-06:002014-02-22T06:51:17.199-06:00Copy-cat LoveThe following is a post I wrote three years ago this week. Today I saw a little girl imitate her mother to perfection and it reminded me of this. . . so I share again a few thoughts about copy-cats and relationships.<br />
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Imitation is. . .</h3>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, sans-serif; font-size: 13.333333969116211px; line-height: 20.22222328186035px;">I saw it again yesterday: a mom who imitated her child so perfectly that it made me laugh. A child who has a parent who loves them enough to mimic them is a blessed child. Uninvolved parents can't do this - parents who are totally fascinated with their children and immersed in their role of parent can. It's really lovely to see.</span></div>
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Children, on the other hand, <u>always</u> imitate their parents. That is grace, pure and simple. Children adore their parents whether the parents deserve it or not. Watch any group of children and you will see their parents emerge. Most preschool teachers will tell you they are rarely surprised when meeting a child's parents - they can already recognize them by their mannerisms.</div>
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True love between a parent and a child may be the closest vision of God's love that we will ever see. Adoring parents watch every move their child makes, and interpret, and re-interpret the meaning behind it. This week a mother pointed to her small child and said "he always rubs his head when he's worried". The child, barely old enough to comprehend "worried." was indeed, at that moment, worried. Children can be equally perceptive of their parents. "My Mommy doesn't feel good. She's got those lines between her eyes" was an unsolicited observation by a very sharp five-year-old. And, sure enough, they soon excused themselves, Mommy citing an impending migraine. </div>
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We've all seen a brother torture his sister by aping every move she makes: "Mom, he's copying me" immediately echoed, usually in unflattering squeaky tones by, "Mom, he's copying me." And whether it's brother/sister, brother/brother, sister/sister imitation - it's a connection born of relationship, a natural expression of sincere affection. With my girls, I noticed that I could always tell when one of them made a new friend because suddenly, a new catch phrase, attitude or habit would invade our home, with no apparent source. Some of these imitations were short-lived; others moved in and became part of the family. </div>
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Imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery, but it is also one of the truest indicators of love. We can imitate those we love because we watch them with great intensity, and we spend as much time as possible together. We are fully immersed in the relationship.</div>
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<i>You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your mind, and with all your strength, and you shall love your neighbor as yourself</i>. Familiar words. If I look to God with the eyes of a child and, in total adoration, imitate what I see, how will I look? Will I, like the preschool children described above, adopt enough God mannerisms that you will learn to recognize God from watching me? Which God mannerisms will your child pick up from watching you?</div>
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Being a parent is a large calling. Don't be afraid; you're never alone in this. The Parent of us all is available as a model. You just have to imitate. </div>
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Julie Huke Klockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06440787934142331627noreply@blogger.com0